Something that isn’t mentioned a lot but I’ve been wondering about recently is sex during pregnancy. Some women become aroused more easily, and climax more quickly, pleasurably, and frequently, and many men find their pregnant wives sexier than ever. Yet while some couples experience pregnancy as a peak erotic time in their life, others experience a downturn in desire or satisfaction. Most couples report both ups and downs.
As I’m single right now, this option isn’t available to me whether I want it or not…. This occasionally becomes an issue what with all the additional hormones etc but then I have to wonder if the opportunity was there, if I would be entirely comfortable doing the deed? During my first trimester I had no interest in sex whatsoever – it simply didn’t exist. I was too sick; too tired; too emotional to care whether I was getting it or not. Once the second trimester moves in, the sex drive tends to return. Time to celebrate with some old fashioned love making or wait until baby is born?
I’ve spoken to various people and the range of answers is surprising: some felt they had an obligation to their partner so they maintained their sex life whether they wanted to or not; some tried, didn’t like it and waited until after the baby was born to start again, and some extremely disliked their partner through pregnancy and would rather have murdered their partner then have sex!
Some guys find the growing pregnant body attractive – more curves, more femine = turn on (very good for the females confidence and self-esteem with their newfound body shape, stretch marks etc)
Some guys find the above weird and don’t appreciate the idea of having sex whilst there is a baby just on the other side of the cervix (slightly selfish if you expect your pregnant, hormone filled partner to be happy to continue sharing the bed with you and not get something good out of it when she has to suffer everything else… Just something you might want to consider!)
Sex is apparently very healthy in pregnancy and helps tighten the pelvic muscles which is very useful when it comes to trying not to pee a little when sneezing! It’s also good for the relationship between partners so you can remember there was and still is a life that isn’t all baby – it’s adult too & to remind each other that you still remember each others needs etc.
What I’ve learnt, I think, is that it’s definitely different for everyone. Different feelings, different beliefs, and different sex drives! There is no right or wrong – if both partners are happy to do it, do it! If both partners would prefer to wait then thats fine too. Whatever works for you is what’s right. So the next time your friend tells you about the amazing sex she had during pregnancy, just smile & nod and continue with what’s amazing for you.
- Sex During Pregnancy: What You Need to Know (everydayhealth.com)